Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t cotton to rapists

Switch 2 quietly makes shiny hunting in Pokémon Scarlet and Violet way better - Polygon

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

Utah health officials monitoring potential measles exposure in southwestern Utah - KSL.com

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

Jessica Alba Reunites With Ex-Husband Cash Warren at Daughter Haven’s Graduation - instyle.com

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

Can you write a short story with a twist ending?

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I know who the president of Turkey really is

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

'I’m Going Back Out': Jake Knapp Wills His Way Into UNC Postseason History - 247Sports

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I see through liars

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

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I have a reading level above third grade

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

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When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

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I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I actually pay taxes

Why men with broken heart syndrome are more likely to die, according to experts - East Idaho News

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I have complete contempt for fakery

Germany’s Merz ventures into Trump’s lion’s den - politico.eu

I can count

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

Warner Bros. Discovery shareholders symbolically vote against giving David Zaslav more money - AV Club

I can read

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

Weekend Box Office: LILO & STITCH KO’s KARATE KID LEGENDS - boxofficepro.com

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

Tesla’s head of Optimus humanoid robot leaves the ‘$25 trillion’ product behind - Electrek

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I have complete contempt for traitorism

Why do people procrastinate and how can they stop?

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

Why has my ex moved on so fast after years of being together with me?

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t buy bullshit

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I understand how hurricane paths work

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet